What's wrong with me? Hhhhh

Udah tiga minggu ini ga bisa tidur. Napa? Karena dalam pikiran v tiap kali v tidur v akan mati. Mati? yup, benar banget. Entah berawal dari apa tapi pikiran itu yang terus ada dan mengendap di otak v, sampai v sesak nafas, keringat dingin, muntah-muntah (maap), pandangan gelap, dan berbagai tanda kepanikan lainnya. Tidur juga harus ditemenin adek, v harus memegang tangannya sambil tidur, untuk memastikan kalo adek v ada disebelah v, dan dia ga boleh tidur sebelum v tidur. v pikir kenapa v kaya gini? napa v kaya orang ga punya iman gini? Sholat udah, ngaji juga udah buat nenangin hati, tapi hanya memberikan ketenangan sesaat.
Awalnya mama ngetawain masalah v, karena v sebenarnya juga emang penakut, tapi karena v ga tidur2 selama tiga hari dan adek v ngomongin ke mama akhirnya mam nyuruh v menemui psikiater. Malu sih waktu ceritain masalah v ke psikiaternya tapi udah kadung, dari pada v ga tidur2 n jadi kurus, ntar malah makin repot ;p Ama psikiaternya v dikasi xanax 0.5 mg dan ada obat dalam bentuk kapsul yang diramu (ga tau campuran obat apa), dan belajar untuk berfikiran positif. Hasilnya v bisa tidur dengan lelapnya selama dua hari. Tapi pikiran itu balik lagi. Ga cuma malam hari seperti biasanya tapi sekarang malah siang hari juga, waktu lagi ngobrol ama teman2 (tiba2 nge-blank), lagi dengerin dosen menjelaskan mata kuliah, dan reaksinya juga sama, panas dingin, keringetan di tangan dan kaki, nafas sesak, bener2 repot. Besok janjian nemuin psikiater lagi, ga tau obat apalagi yang akan dicekoki ke v, tapi v sangat berharap, berusaha, dan berdoa agar pikiran buruk ini segera keluar dari pikiran dan diri v, ga kuat bermusuhan dengan pikiran diri sendiri, capek... hhhh

Drivin Me Wild - Common Feat. Lily Allen

Drivin' Me Wild

It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
No it's not a mystery, it's everything

She was the type to watch Oprah and the Today Show
Be on the treadmill, uh, like "Okay, go"
Had a body, A body that you can't pay fo'
That mean she had some Ds on her but they wasn't fake though
Had a drive for a drive for Rodeo
She spent pesos on those Lebeaus
Spin class at the gym, strip tease on a pole
She was so obsessed with her body and clothes
To every party she goes, tryin hard to be chose
They say it's hard for a pimp but extra hard for these (hoes)
Readin Us and People Mag, tryna get the scoop
Chasin a actor for a Bentley Coupe
She been through the ball player from the Clippers, then came the pumps
All thinkin she number one where she was just a jumpoff
Doin all she can for a man and a baby
Drivin herself crazy like the astronaut lady

It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
No it's not a mystery, it's everything

He had paper since we was in we was in high school
Pop was a doc, mom taught at my school
Lock with the rocks, in his ears he kept jewels
One of the Diddy types, da D-D-Dame Dash dudes
Pushed a Maserati Sport, readin the Robb Report
Wanted to be Mike but he was never live at sports
Since golf is in he was on the drivin course
To live the rap life is what he was strivin for
Spendin cash at the bar to get credit
Drinkin Chaundon just because Big said it
They say Ye is but dude was big headed
Rocked the fur in the summer so somebody'd pet it
He had a fetish for shoes that's athletic
Pathetic on his MySpace page half nekkid
It's a shame what they do for fame and to be respected
Joe, you coulda got it if you never woulda stressed it

It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
No it's not a mystery, it's everything

They was one of them couples, people said they were the it
Unbreakable, like Bobby and Whit
Or Ryan and Reese, or Kimora and Russ
Relationships can be dead but look live to us
I guess we all been through it where we try too much
Losin yourself and you're lyin and stuff
Wishin for the diamond cuffs, in search of a ring
Where love is not a mystery it's everything

It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
It's this thing now, that's drivin' me wild
I gotta see what's up before it gets me down
No it's not a mystery, it's everything

Gets me down
Gets me down
Gets me down
Gets me down
Gets me down
Gets me
No it's not a mystery, it's everything

Alicia Keys - No One

I just want you close
Where you can stay forever
You can be sure
That it will only get better
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cuz
Everything's going to be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all i know is everything's going to be alright

No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you
Can get in the way of what I feel for you

When the rain is pouring down
And my heart is hurting
You will always be around
This I know for certain
You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cuz
Everything's going to be alright
People keep talking they can say what they like
But all i know is everything's going to be alright

No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you
Can get in the way of what I feel

I know some people search the world
To find something like what we have
I know people will try try to divide something so real
So til the end of time I'm telling you there is no one

No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you
Can get in the way of what I feel for you

Don't Judge the Book by its Cover, Really?

Repot banget d kalo jadi orang yang gendut kaya v, secara berat badan v sekarang 90kg dengan tinggi 167cm, kalo diitung dengan bmi (body mass index)udah masuk ke golongan obesitas. Buat v sebenarnya ga masalah sih punya badan kaya gini, toh v tidak mengalami gangguan dalam melakukan aktivitas, cuma buat lingkungan v, orang tua v, adek v, temen2 v. Berkali2 v disuruh diet, ngurusin badan, ngecilin badan.V udah melakukan berbagai macam cara juga buat ngecilin badan v, diet low carb, tiger diet, minum herbal, minum obat2an, akupuntur, olah raga 8 kali seminggu, tetap aja badan v kaya gini, turun juga maksimal 7 kilo, ga kaya yang orang lain ato bahkan contoh terdekat v (adek v) turun 30 dengan olah raga tanpa minum obat2an ato apapun. Usut punya usut, ternyata metabolisme v sangat rendah, kata dokter limpa n ginjal v lemah, nah harus makan yang sehat. V udah coba melakukan itu semua-makan sayur, buah, beras merah, tidak minum cola dan sejenisnya-tapi tetep aja badan kaya gini, turun enggak, malah makin melar ;p sebelumnya berat v "cuma 75" malah naik berkilo-kilo. Protes yang paling keras datang dari mama, karena mam bilang "kalo terus gendut kaya gini, ga bakal ada perusahaan yang mau nerima kk kalo kk melamar pekerjaan, karena selain ip dan sebangsanya penampilan juga sangat diperhatikan, kk mau?" adek v juga bilang " ga mungkin banget seseorang mengenal orang lain tanpa melihat penampilannya, people always judge the book by its cover" Pertanyaan v, benarkah?

Parodi-Samuel Mulya & Benny and Mice - Jakarta Luar Dalam

V n adek v sehari2 berlangganan harian Kompas buat nambah-nambah isi kepala yang kayanya udah mau penuh aja dengan urusan kuliah ;p Kalo adek v -bayu- selalu memulai bacaannya dengan mengambil halaman bisnis walaupun sebenarnya ga nyambung banget ama kuliahnya (sipil) kemudian halaman utama, halaman yogyakarta, baru d baca2 halaman klasika. Kalo v pastinya selalu baca halaman utama langsung ke halaman yang memuat surat pembaca, baru d baca yang lain2, yang paling akhir banget v baca pasti berita tentang bisnis, cape bacanya bo, secara indonesia tetap aja jadi negara miskin hehehe
Buat kami, Kompas hari Minggu selalu ditunggu karena ada dua rubrik yang pasti kami baca yaitu rublik Urban (Parodi)nya Samuel Mulya dan Komik Benny and Mice. Rubrik parodinya Samuel Mulya biasanya berisi sindiran-sindiran kejadian sehari2 yang buat v kena banget, yang v paling seneng yaitu tulisan Samuel tentang orang tua yang memaksakan anaknya untuk masuk universitas dan bidang studi yang ga diminati (Aku tak Biasa - Kompas, Minggu 13 Mei 2007)which is kejadian dengan adek v, dan banyak kejadian lain yang jadi bahan sentilan Samuel Mulya. Rubrik ngocol komik Benny n Mice biasanya diisi dengan cerita yang sederhana namun lucu mengingatkan kita akan kehidupan sehari-hari, misalnya heboh Breadtalk, celana skinny, atau cerita tentang kejadian seru di bulan ramadhan. September ini Benny n Mice akhirnya ngeluarin buku kumpulan komiknya dengan judul Jakarta Luar Dalem.

TV Performance

Ga beda dengan rekaman dalam CD ataupun video klip, suara Annie Lennox benar2 bagus kalo tampil secara live. Beda banget dengan Bagusan Burung Beo kelompok vokal di negeri Antah-Berantah yang terdiri dari artis opera sabun, yang masing-masing suaranya menurut v, sebagai orang awam sama sekali ga ada bagus2nya, walaupun suara mereka digabung, tapi cuma mengandalkan tampang yang lumayan. Kelompok vokal tersebut jauuuuuuuuuh dibawah Annie Lennox hehehe

Annie Lennox - No More I Love You's

Unik,kata pertama yang v ingat waktu v liat video klip ini pertama kali, tahun 1995. Video klipnya bagus banget, klasik, kaya opera, terus model video klipnya cowok yang didandanin kaya cewe atau mungkin transeksual? who knows?

Dulu v sampe mikir kalo Annie Lennox ini transeksual, tapi ternyata seorang ibu dengan tiga orang anak hehehe Lennox lahir di Skotlandia, bersekolah di sekolah menengah khusus wanita, kemudian melanjutkan kuliahnya di Royal Academy of Music di London, dengan spesialisasi alat musik flute. Bergabung dalam band The Tourist, kemudian membentuk Duo Eurythmics, lalu memulai solo album dengan judul album yang mungkin menurut sebagian besar orang judul tersebut aneh, misalnya Diva (1992), Medusa (1995), Bare (2003), Song of Mass Destruction (2007), tapi itulah Lennox. Punya suara alto, Lennox bisa bikin v deg-degan dengerin lagunya. Kalo ga percaya coba liat video klipnya d.